My 21st birthday

Really, Birthday's nothing great.
I'm always wondering why people like to organise partys on their birthdays, particularly their 21st birthday. And if they would want their 21st birthday to be special, why must they take my special day away.
I'm not into partys, but i really wish my birthday to be a little more special than the other days. This may mean staying at home alone, going for a good basketball match and have some private time for myself at night (not doing any form of work that is). However, my birthday was a worse than average day, if i define an average day as a day of hard work, some games, and a little sports. I've wasted my 21st birthday on entertaining people.
From the start of the day, nothing seem to be special. Like previous years, i celebrated my bithday with cheekiong, alvin and the rest (if there were any form of celebration at all). I thought it was not nice to reject since we're always celebrating one another's birthday. It supposed to start at 2.30.
The day was spent on shopping with my friends. We went to look at evening gowns, watches and accessories, and that's from plaza sing to heeren. It was funny that they asked me to pick my gift, as if birthday gift should be something that i'm lacking.
They wanted the celebration to be dinner, and Alvin said something about me not appreciating the effort, so i pushed away my basketball game (which i really really wanted to go). I did mention that i want to go karaokie, but at 7.30 pm, i knew it would end late and i would rather go for a simple meal and get back home for some celebration with myself. but it was still decided that we go karaokie (and that was really because cheekiong really wanted to go, he was too deaf for me). I couldn't be a bad sport. During the session, i wasn't happy at all (try going for a session that others pick many many songs to hog the system and u r singing songs that are chosen by others).
Supper followed (I should have headed back for home then). It was at changi where all the ah-guas are. It had passed 12mn and i was really unpleased with the day already. Little did i expect that after supper they drove a few rounds to see the trans... and that really was a test of my patience.. where should i be at that place entertaining these people on my special day. I realised my threshold level is actually quite high.
I'm not a very straightforward guy. I hide my emotions and feelings from everyone, and i really think that is why i deserve a birthday like that. How do i tell people i'm not happy when their intention was to celebrate for me?
And now i don't even have much time for myself. I have to worry about tomorrow's tuition, my life sci quiz, and my maths revision. I know i have to get some sleep soon, i'm just too pissed to sleep now.
Think i'll stick with my own plans in the future. Birthday isn't a day to be pissed.

I'm always tossing and turning on my bed before i can finally fall asleep. I have this habit of thinking and musing on bed, and its typically the reason why i'm suffering from insomnia. Bedtime is normally the only time i'll think about life and other things more personal. It's a time for me to sort out my thoughts.
The problem with my habit now is that i have no idea where my thoughts are leading me to. Like sometimes i'll think about many many things which are not related at all, but yet they do seem to be delivering a special meaning to my life. Sometimes, my thoughts left me more confused.
Bedtime thoughts always affect my mood the next day. Sometimes i feel stranded and lost just because of these bedtime thoughts. Wish i can decipher some of them and type them down next time.

nicks

i'm quite impressed with some of the msn nicks, here's a few of my fav

1) beer doesn't solve your problems, but then again, neither does milk.
2) i'm falling into the pit of love... fall too deep and can't climb out... speed of descend is too fast... reality seems afar.
3) anyone awake??? i'm not
4) i raced against time, and i lost

heavy rain... strong winds... dark clouds.... I was out fishing with uncle chow again

knock knock.........
knock knock knock..........
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK.......
BONG BONG BONG...

Disturbed by the knocking noises, i got off my bed and opened the door to see who it was.
It was Wuyan in his running attire.

'hey, just go for the relay, we're short of ppl.'
'when???' i asked, rubbing my eyes
'NOW!!!! see you downstairs' wuyan said

i had to come up with some excuses. I looked at the dark sky and thought it was already 6 in the evening.

'erm... i'm meeting someone at 7, so i can't go.....'
'but it's only 5, u'll make it back in time.!!'
'really ah???'

i couldn't think of anymore excuses. So i changed into my running attire and went to SRC, with my messy hair and sleepy face.

Anyway, it wasn't bad. Since ppl were pulled into the team at the very last minute, there wasn't pressure for us to win. And we get to earn points just by participating. so no harm lah.... plus there were a couple of cute girls at that place.

It was time for us to choose the sequence of the runners. i chosed to be the last since i've no experience in running a relay. i need to see when and where others pick up the baton. and contrary to what many will think, being the lastman actually face less pressure than the first 3 men, cos most of the time lastmen have little control over the outcome of the race.

True to what we had expected, we got 4th out of the 4 running teams....